


Not Every Scar is One You can See

by tightropetwitter



Series: Soft Stucky Stories [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bleeding, Blood, Blood and Injury, Brainwashing, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Flashbacks, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hydra (Marvel), Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Minor Injuries, Protective Steve Rogers, Two Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2018-07-20
Packaged: 2019-06-13 07:59:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15359853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tightropetwitter/pseuds/tightropetwitter
Summary: Something happened between 1991 and 2014 for HYDRA to think that Bucky needed a mouth guard. What was it?





	1. 1991

The cuffs tightened around Bucky’s arms, the headpieces moved into place shortly after.

It was a routine he’d gone through plenty of times before, but it didn’t stop his heart from feeling like it was going to burst or his chest from heaving as he panted. 

He didn’t know for sure if it was because by now he had just learned to anticipate the pain or if there happened to be some shred of humanity that they couldn’t beat out of him. Some scrap that could still feel, some part of him that was afraid.

The cold metal made contact with his head. Bucky braced himself for the torment, and then it came.

His first reaction to the pain was to scream. It wasn’t intentional, it was primal, he didn’t want to, it wasn’t like it would make a difference to those around him, it didn’t matter to them how much he howled in pain, as long as he was getting the job done.

The pain had quickly climbed to its usual level, something akin to the feeling of his skull being split open. His throat started to feel raw, his lungs started to burn. There was a reason he rarely spoke as the Winter Soldier, screaming yourself hoarse doesn’t leave you sound very intimidating.

Bucky’s hands tightened into fists, the dull pain of his fingernails digging into his palm didn’t even register. 

His body twitched forward, yet another unintentional response, his jaw snapped shut quickly and suddenly a different, stinging pain shot through his mouth, almost instantaneously his mouth filled with blood.

Bucky arched his back, screaming in a lower guttural tone he started to fight the restraints, thrashing violently against them, sending blood down his chin and neck.

That was when it something he’d never seen before happened, the other doctors looking concerned, wondering if the mind-alteration had actually done fatal damage. Finally killing their perfect assassin.

It was a blur as the small group of four rushed around him. The words they shouted were muffled by the skull-shattering pain from the machine.

The feeling of relief as the machine shut off was unlike anything else, however it was usually followed by another few years in cryosleep, even so those few moments right after the session ends, is the closest thing he could get to peace, but this time the shooting pain and the metallic taste that was starting to creep down his throat kept him from being able to calm.

A red river of dark blood started to pour onto his chest as two of the doctors pinned his shoulders back as one of the others stepped forward to examine the source of the bleeding. 

It only took a moment for him to find it, the doctor sighed as he saw it was nothing serious “It’s fine. He bit his tongue, It’s purely superficial.” he stated stepping back, sounding annoyed “Finish wiping him.” he said turning to leave “Just remember to get him something to bite down on next time.” he said to the doctor next to him as they walked out.

The headpieces were quickly lowered back into place, this time Bucky stopped fighting back. Blood pooled onto his lap as they turned it back on. This time his screams felt even more hollow, another piece of him chipped away.


	2. 2016

For once in their lives, Steve and Bucky were enjoying some quiet. For once no one seemed to be in immediate danger. For once they could sit together and just  _ be _ .

Steve had one arm was rested around Bucky’s shoulders as slept, he was awake earlier but it didn’t last. Steve didn’t mind if he slept, after all Bucky wasn’t the most sound sleeper during the night, between how long it usually took him to fall asleep, the nightmares, it wasn’t always the easiest task. He was just happy to be able to spend time with him, even if he was asleep.

His other hand held a book. Another title from his seemingly never ending list of things to catch up on. Steve felt Bucky stirring against his arm, he cocked his head slightly to look down at him. 

Without waking up Bucky shifted slightly, leaning a bit further into Steve’s shoulder, he yawned softly, it was almost childlike.

That was when Steve noticed, he only say it for a moment, and it was such a silly thing to notice, but the end of Bucky’s tongue was sort of rough, not quite jagged, more asymmetrical than anything else. It was just sort of uneven, flattened to the right leaving a sort of point at the left. He wasn’t quite sure why he noticed it particularly right now but, it was there.

Was it always like that? It probably was. Wasn’t it? It was hard to remember, it wasn’t exactly like Steve had a perfect memory to compare it to. Of all the memories Steve had of Bucky, of the things he wanted to remember about him, that wasn’t exactly a high priority. It was probably nothing. It just  _ felt _ off, not necessarily in a negative way, but it was  _ off _ . He couldn’t help feeling something happened there.

Steve turned back to his book, flipping to the next page, attempting to brush off any remaining curiosities. He was probably overthinking it anyway, whatever it was.

 

* * *

 

“I’m gonna read for a bit.” Bucky said getting into bed next to Steve “I’m not really that tired yet.” Steve chuckled softly “Maybe that has something to do with the three hour nap you took.” he teased playfully “It was  _ not  _ three hours.” Bucky retorted pulling the blanket over his lap “Oh it was. You were asleep on  _ my  _ arm, and I was trapped there for three hours. I finished my book.” Steve smirked.

Bucky laughed softly “Alright.” he conceded opening his book. 

As Steve looked up at Bucky sitting next to him, watching him laugh, that little question from earlier crept up on him. 

Normally Steve was perfectly fine at ignoring things, hiding his own questions if it seemed like the answer wasn’t worth it. Apparently if it regarded Bucky, all rules went out the window. Something about it kept gnawing at him.

“Buck?” Steve asked “Yeah?” he asked looking over at Steve “What happened to your tongue?” he asked softly, there was a silence, he suddenly realized what a crazy question it was, but Bucky replied before he had a chance to redact his sentence “Do you really want to know?” he asked resting his book on his lap. 

Steve shrugged softly “If you’ll tell me.” he replied “Alright.” Bucky said closing his book “ _ I _ …” he hesitated, lengthening the sound “Bit it off...” he said candidly “They were wiping me after a mission and I, uh, tightened my jaw.” he half-lied, not eager to tell Steve all about how much pain HYDRA put him through, he knew enough. It wasn’t a complete lie anyways, he just left out the part about him screaming in agony.

“And I guess I did it too fast and….” he sighed, his eyes seemed focused on something that wasn’t even in the room “Next thing I knew I was dripping blood...” he said quietly.

Steve put his hand on Bucky’s leg “I’m sorry.” he said “I shouldn’t have asked, I didn’t mean to make you up bring up painful memories.” he apologized.

Bucky put his hand over Steve’s “Don’t be sorry.” he said “It’s my past, and it’s gonna come up sometimes. I have to be able to confront it on my own.” 

“Well I love you with or without a piece of your tongue.” Steve said with a soft smile. Bucky lifted Steve’s hand to his lips “I love you too.” he whispered.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is weird, this is a weird fic and it's stupid. I'm fully aware of that, but while I was rewatching the Captain America series I noticed something, in the scene where they wipe him in Civil War he's just screaming, but in Winter Solider they gave him a mouth guard. So I was wondering if there was something that happened between 1991 and 2014 for them to decide he needed a mouth guard because I highly doubt HYDRA would take the time to get him a mouth guard if he didn't need one. So this idea came to my mind and I had to just write it and post it so it would get out of my head. I hope you enjoyed it, or maybe you hated it. I don't care, I just had to get this idea outta my brain.


End file.
